Somewhere Beyond the Clouds
by Aurorax
Summary: A series of drabbles and one-shots set a few years post-LK, following the lives of Tobe, Irnai, Loey, Gydo, and the other New Hope kids as they grow up and head to Corus to find their own places in the kingdom.  Based on a set of 31 days prompts.
1. Cry Warrior

These drabbles are based on an old collection of 31_days prompts; I just rediscovered them and are hoping to finish the entire set. They will focus on the lives of the New Hope children, as they grow up and find their own unique roles in Tortall. All characters and settings belong to Tamora Pierce.

This first one is stream of consciousness and I know the long sentences are a bit hard to get through; don't worry they won't all be like this.

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><p><strong>Title: <strong>Cry Warrior

**Prompt: **Pink ribbon scars that never forget

**Character: **Tobe and Loey

_It is such a secret place, the land of tears. ~ Antoine de Saint-Exupery, The Little Prince_

Loey was still sitting by the Scanran man with the spear in his stomach, her spear that had kept both of them from falling dead on this field where monsters where made, when he had felt the arrow in his side and gray clouds had burst before his eyes. The sharp acrid smell of burning flesh and metal made his eyes water and the heat from the funeral pyre stole the breath from his throat, he knew that the others were saying prayers over their dead but he had wanted to find her and now they were here alone with the man she had killed. And she was crying too, real tears that streamed in flowing rivulets down her ash-darkened face but there was no blood, or at least not her own, and he didn't know what to do. It wasn't a real wound that he could see but something deeper inside and he understood that now, after these months of war. He understood it well enough to know that he couldn't offer a bandage or fetch a healer or do anything but stand there and watch her like she was a skittish colt new under saddle, waiting to see whether she would bolt or break. Because this pain was different, it was the type that never went away, like he had felt when they had burned Haven and whipped his people, like he had felt when he realized that Lady Kel had left him behind and he was going to be alone again, not someone's anything anymore.

They'd fought into the night as far as he could figure but what with the castle on fire and everyone running about getting the horses all riled, it felt as if they were caught in some strange half-light, when the circling stormwings or maybe just the fury of the war had nearly extinguished the sun. He could just see well enough to wish that he couldn't see the bodies and the tears and the blood, most of all the blood that stained the ground and his clothes and Loey's hands that she held out towards him as if reaching for something just beyond her grasp. And when he took her hands they were warm and wet and he could feel the torn flesh circling her wrists like bracelets from where they had been tied, still raw and raised now but later scars that would stay with her forever like these memories and this moment. She had fought to get free and it made his heart leap even as she shuddered under the pain of his touch because he knew her spirit and that it was strong and wild and too free to be held down forever, even by this. She had been a warrior when she had saved his life and when she had chosen to stay and fight, knowing how much it might cost, and she would grow up to be a better warrior still, like Lady Kel or the copper-hearted woman who had taught the animals to fight like men. But Lady Kel had cried and warriors could cry and he told her that while they sat and watched the flames burn down. Soon would be the morning and the future and maybe sometime the war would end, they were together and he would never let her be taken away again, it was all over finally and they could go home.


	2. Somewhere Beyond the Clouds

**Title:** Somewhere Beyond the Clouds

**Prompt:** Walking on Higher Ground

**Character: **Gydo

_I know that I shall meet my fate; Somewhere among the clouds above; Those that I fight I do not hate; Those that I guard I do not love. ~ WB Yeats_

She had to hurry- the women who oversaw the Palace laundries had eyes like hawks, and even though she had only been working a few days it was clear that they recognized her instantly. It seemed that every few minutes was punctuated by the sharp cry of "Wring it harder" or "You there girl, speed that work". She was just a nameless face in the crowd, but she was a new face and that ensured she was never forgotten. Even if she used getting lost as an excuse, it could only buy her half a bell of peace at the most; and soon she would have no explanation at all. In the Palace service you learned quickly or you lost your place, and there was always someone willing to make the lessons stick in a more permanent manner.

Still, Gydo looked out across the kaleidoscope patchwork of pastures and stables and training courts that swept below her vision, savoring a last frozen moment. She had found this spot high on the curtain wall within a few hours of her arrival at the Palace, and had claimed it as her own; it was one of the few places where she could find peace in the whirlwind of new duties and wrong turns and endless staircases that had been her introduction to a laundrymaid's life. From here she had stolen a moment to watch the Rider recruits choosing their new mounts, some walking boldly among the herd, others hanging by the fence, evaluating with eyes to far to be classified as contemplative or fearful. What would she have done? It was impossible to tell, though the pretty chestnut with the neat gait and the wide white blaze had danced through her dreams that night, and she knew it would have been hers in another life.

Today there were no Riders, just a mass of trampled ground that only accentuated the fact that she had been left behind. The air up here was hazy with the heat and the height so if she squinted she could almost imagine the glint of Tobe's blond head as he held a bridle or the crimson glow of the scarf Loey used to tie up her dark hair, a parting gift from Fanche. They were gone now and she followed the trail of churned dirt with her eyes until it blended with the line of the horizon and dissolved into the clouds.

"You watch your brother, keep him out of trouble, keep him safe. You're a young woman now, and I'm trusting you with this, so don't let me here that you left him alone or let someone else watch him. Meech is your responsibility." They were the words she had heard every morning, without fail, as her mother was leaving for kitchen duty. They were the reason that she had taken a boy of five to spear drills and weapons training, annoyed at having extra duties but secretly thrilled to be left in charge. They were also her mother's final words, on the bright morning that had given no warning of the fire that was to come. Gydo had seen her mother's body, a black Scanran arrow in her chest, as the enemy tied her hands and forced her away with the rest of the children, and at that moment she had vowed to honor the words like her mother's last wish.

New Hope had been their home and it had been a good one, where so many were orphaned that they became one another's family and the world never seemed too bleak to find a smile. But there were few ways to earn a living and many had left in the time following the end of the war and Lady Kel's reassignment, so she and Meech had gone with Tobe and Loey and the other children who were no longer children to Corus. Meech was nine now and able to take care of himself, or at least that was what he told her, but they were all each other had and she couldn't drag him along to training camp and on spidren hunts like she had dragged him to weapons practice years ago. She had kept her vow, and watched as the others rode away, knowing that she had been more a soldier at twelve than she would ever be now. In these moments she hated her brother for keeping her here, where it made no difference that she had been able to outshoot most of the men at camp and a good amount of the soldiers too; but then she hated herself for even thinking that, knowing that he too had a warrior's heart, and they were trapped here together.

She couldn't afford to lose this job, not when her meager salary and the coin that Meech earned running messages was barely enough to keep them fed, so she got to her feet once more and picked up the basket of fresh linens, smoothing her hair with her free hand and tucking in the stray strands that had been blown loose by the wind. Her delivery was bound for the Queen's chambers, so she wanted to look her best- she was young and obedient and well-mannered, and a maid's salary was higher than a laundress's, if she could only catch the eye of a young noblewoman. A small ambition, to be sure, but she was a dreamer and life held no hope without something to strive for. But the room, when she had found it at last after three wrong turns and a near-collision with a towering mage who seemed to have looked right through her, was so full of colorful silks and chatter that she slipped in unnoticed. Who was she to them, who could flirt and dance and shoot and ride, but just another washer-girl who saw the opportunities Tortall presented to be more than that and turned her back on them still?

She had almost stepped out the doorway when a clear voice arrested her step. "You're one of Lady Keladry's children?" The dark-haired woman with the strong face and searching eyes was startling enough when silent, and the surprise of being addressed by a noble caught Gydo off-guard. She didn't see the Queen's reassuring smile in her flustered embarrassment, but she could hear the taste of it in the words, and knew that they were asked with kindness. There was respect in them, and a strange recognition of the pain, like a bond was being formed between them which only a few could truly understand.

"Yes, ma'am". She ducked her head as she curtsied, in deference to the nobles and to hide her own small smile of pride. Maybe she was just a common washerwoman but she had seen the Kraken and been trained to fight by the Lady Knight herself. Someday she would stand on that wall and finally be able to see what the world held in store, and when that day came she would ride and ride and never look back. But for now she watched and waited, dreaming of somewhere beyond the clouds.


	3. Maybe It's a Good Thing

**Title:** Maybe It's a Good Thing

**Prompt:** Is it a groove or is it a rut?

**Character: **Tobe

_How lucky I am to have something that makes saying goodbye so hard. ~ A.A. Milne, Winnie-the-Pooh _

War and necessity could bring anyone together, but Tobe liked to think that for them, it was something more. Sometimes things just fit, like that first time you ride the perfect horse and two blends into one to make something so purely right that you know it will save your life someday. And he and Kel were one of those things- she made him eat his vegetables, he made sure she didn't skip meals; she taught him to defend himself with staff and bow, he brought her glaive and helm when the horn calls rang out bright and clear above the enemy raiders. She had saved him once, years ago, when she had taken him from the past which was still written in scars across his back and mind, and she saved him again every day by showing him how different life could be. And he repayed her in turn, or tried to whenever possible, seeing that enemies were thrown from their mounts in battle or more simply by just being there, always.

But now his mind was full of leaving. It sounded strange to his ears still, telling the people who had become his family that he dreamed of Corus and of trying his luck with the Riders. They were proud of him, he could see it in their eyes, though no one said very much- it seemed as if the world had gotten more quiet in the years of war, or maybe it was just his imagination.

No one ever would have guessed that he would be the one to leave. He had clung to Kel from the start, afraid to get close but even more afraid to get too far and watch her walk away once more. He had seen to much lost in life to take any chances, and he could still feel the breaking in his heart the morning that he woke to find she had left for Scanra without him. But years pass and people grow, and every day now he felt like the walls of camp, once so strong and protective, holding out the fearsome world, where closing in farther and farther, keeping him shut in instead. More than anything, he wanted to see, and it was time to step out into the sun. He knew it would be dazzling, especially at first, but maybe it would light the way to whatever it was that he searched for still.

More than anything, though, he was doing it for Kel. She wouldn't see it that way, not at first; he knew that, and was afraid of the pain that he would cause, because pain was the last thing that Lady Kel deserved. After all she had given him, it was strange to think that he had given something back, enough to be noticeable when he took it away. But he had seen recently the way she gravitated towards him at night, when Neal and Yuki were in Headquarters and Owen sat on the patch of grass behind the stable with his betrothed, and the fires framed men holding their wives and lovers close. She was lonely in a secret way which few could see, like a flickering shadow which danced so swiftly across her face at certain moments that you could only catch the merest glimpse of it from the corner of your eye. So they sat and played chess together, or she taught him to do sums, and sometimes he sang to her in the fading light to hear her laugh and watch the load that she bore upon her shoulders lighten for a shining moment.

Maybe it's a good thing, his leaving. That's what Tobe tells himself as he begins to make plans, letting it be real for the first time, because he is not a dreamer, not usually. He tells himself that he is not taking her smiles away, because she is the type of person who needs to smile, and who shouldn't be lonely. She will find someone else to take his place, someone her own age, maybe Merric who would do anything for her; or the young refugee man who always wins the archery contests until the Lady Knight comes to watch and he can barely hit the target. So maybe it's a good thing, his leaving, because when he is gone she'll have to find someone else to be with, someone else who fits her as well as he does; and maybe this time, it will be the person who will stay forever.


	4. Memories of Drowning

**Title:** Memories of Drowning

**Prompt:** Nothing Ended, Nothing Begun, Nothing Resolved

**Character: **Irnai

_I remember that life in that room seemed to be occurring beneath the sea. Time flowed past indifferently above us; hours and days had no meaning. ~ James Baldwin_

Time passes differently when you're strange like me. But you're not strange like me- the dark-robed mages say that no one is, that I'm the only one. Their minds slid over me and through me, leaving a sour taste in my mouth and burning lights behind my eyes that I could never blink away. The watching was worse, though; there was always someone watching, as I sat in my lessons or stepped out into the gardens, even while I slept, recording the muttered ramblings of half-forgotten dreams. All that for three months, my every word being recorded, analyzed, and evaluated, and all they could tell me was that there was nothing they could do. They said I was special but they meant to say alone.

I'm not sure what will happen now. Will I be allowed to stay here, with no one to teach me? I don't mind the classes, but I wish there weren't so many people. There are moments when I lose myself and I can feel their eyes on me, wondering. Some of them know; some even ask about their futures, like I'm some common teller of fortunes who can read the world's mysteries on their palm. It has always surprised me, the desire of men to know what lies ahead, as if they can prepare for their destinies. I'm not one for surprises myself, but is it still life when each day is merely one more to wait?

It's frightening to find myself lost in this strange place, without Lady Kel's strong hands and steady voice to lead me back. I see the future in my visions and the past in my nightmares until the hours swirl like ribbons into space. I need an anchor, to keep me from drowning in memories that are yet to be. But that would mean something permanent, putting down roots, which scares me in a different way. Do I want to spend my life here, among the cold high halls and faces flowing like currents on the sea, always changing, always laughing? Maybe this is what home feels like; I really wouldn't know. Maybe I'm just the type of person who never truly fits in any place, and in that case I might as well just stay. It saves me the hassle of packing and trouble of explaining again, at the very least.

Tonight I'm going to meet the red-haired mage again. The first time I saw him, I thought that I was being sent away. I had been waiting patiently for days to be summoned, knowing that the only thing stopping them was not knowing where to send me back to. When the message finally came, it was almost a relief, after so many days of uncertainty. At least now I would know. The man in charge of my testing had always appeared faceless in my mind, just a heavy black robe and a pair of bottomless eyes, but when I stepped into his office I saw the red-haired man. He was brighter, more memorable, and though he let himself slide across my mind like they all did, he was gentler at first. I liked him; his magic was the color of crocuses and felt like the spring sun. It started to burn as he forgot himself and dug deeper, searching for answers, but I expected that. I didn't expect him to stop suddenly and shake himself as if emerging from deep water, and I certainly didn't expect him to apologize for hurting me; no one had ever apologized before. Though he was angry I was not afraid, because I knew it was not at me but at himself for losing control.

He asked to see me again, so I agreed; I wonder if tonight will be the night that he realizes there's no hope for me. And then he'll tell me I'm special, like they all do, but he'll really mean alone. I hope it's tonight, just as I hope that maybe someday when all this testing ends, my life will finally be able to begin.


	5. Playing Against Type

**Title:** Playing Against Type

**Prompt:** We'll be closer than the stars

**Character: **Loey and Vania

_To these two life had come quickly and gone, leaving not bitterness, but pity; not disillusion, but only pain. ~ F. Scott Fitzgerald_

It was a week into training camp and Loey stood alone, looking out over the silent practice courts and breathing deeply of their peace and promise. She could feel the excitement building up inside of her, until it was almost a struggle to stay in one place; she wanted to run, fast across the hard-packed ground until the nervous energy that filled her was replaced by a burning emptiness. It was a wonderful feeling, knowing that she had given every last bit of her strength. Many of the other trainees complained about how hard they were being worked, resenting the exhaustion and aching muscles, but she lived for that moment of near-collapse, knowing that it would bring her a dreamless sleep. Today they would be riding their own mounts for the first time, testing out the two ponies they had picked from the herd a day prior. It would be the first time that she had ever had something that was all her own; and Loey knew that she might be an orphan girl with barely a copper to her name, but once she climbed upon the back of her beautiful sorrel mare she would feel like a princess, if only for a moment.

The others were still in the mess hall, taking advantage of the last lazy moments of morning before the start of another long day. Loey knew that they whispered about her, when she grabbed her food and headed outside before most had even rolled out of bed. They wondered who she was, why she preferred to be alone, whether she thought she was too good for them; and when the other girls stayed up laughing together and making bets on who would be the next to head home, she was left with to stare at silence. The friends she lacked here made it hurt all the more when she remembered those she had left behind, her real friends who would have understood that it was too hard to sit in the long mess hall; it was so like the one at New Hope, and brought the memories back. She still caught glimpses of Tobe, hanging around the stables helping Onua with the ponies, but he was too young yet to join the recruits and she'd heard rumors that he'd be sent away with some of the soldiers before long. Once she thought she'd seen Gydo, high atop the castle walls, but the wind had blown her greeting across the open fields unheard. Fanche, Saefas, Lady Kel- they couldn't protect her here, couldn't offer their guidance anymore. Now, she had to do it on her own.

But even the pre-dawn grounds before her were not completely empty. The young woman was there, the same that she had seen every morning alone on the archery courts. It was one of the reasons she came here, to this specific corner of the practice yard, rather than seeking out the cool shadow of the adjacent gardens or the patch of sunlit grass beside the stables. The rhythm of the bowstring struck a soothing cadence that seemed to clear her mind of the doubts and fears, the memories that made her miss a place she had never realized was home until she had left it behind. Loey sat and breathed slowly in time with the twang and thump that always came, one after another, happy to have found something steady and constant at a time when all she could see was change.

It was almost two weeks before they spoke for the first time, both afraid to encroach on the other's silence. Loey hadn't recognized the youngest princess, but she had heard talk in the barracks about Vania and knew that this was the woman about whom the other recruits gossiped. Each day her curiosity had encouraged her to take another step closer, until she was able to see that the princess was pretty in an understated way, without the striking contrast of her mother and older sisters. Vania's hair was a lighter brown and her skin was slightly less pale; it was impossible to tell the color of her eyes from this distance.

Loey knew it was against all social conventions and traditions, and that the dusty old man who had been sent to teach them "a semblance of manners" when Evin and Buri were out of ideas would lose his head at her, but she couldn't help herself. She was sociable by nature, and feeling shut out from the other recruits had been taking its toll. She called out a quiet hello, wondering if the princess would respond. Vania looked up without dropping her loaded bow, holding it crosswise against her chest. To some it would seem a warning, perhaps even a veiled threat; but Loey had been around enough soldiers to know that some people were just more comfortable with a weapon in their hands. Then Vania smiled a quick, polite smile and offered out a gloved hand.

They met every morning in the early spring, often just practicing archery or going riding together, saying very little. Many thought that Vania was too proud and condescending; she didn't dance at the balls any more than her station required, and she didn't seek out the attention of others her age like her siblings had. But Loey could see that she was just the serious kind of shy that was more at home among books and reports than foreign ambassadors, and was most happy when keeping her own company. Almost 18, she would soon be married to a foreign prince and already she was fading out of the patchwork of Tortall, perhaps to make her coming departure less painful. The silence was a shared silence, a comfortable silence, which brought Loey a home and Vania a moment of peace. When they talked, it was about horses and history and literature, never about the future. These mornings were for forgetting.

Vania was betrothed; Loey never knew his name, and though she could have found out easily- a princess's marriage was sure to be talked of- she never did. They both wondered who would leave first, silently to themselves, but each knew that the other thought it as well and they were drawn even closer, spinning an interminable web of mornings that might be the last. But it really didn't matter who was first; what mattered was that this was an ending, the forever kind, and Loey wondered if she could ever remember how to live on her own anymore. Maybe it would hurt too much. And then one day Vania was gone, three days before they left for summer camp in the hills, as quick and as simple and as heartbreaking as that. Loey was surprised that there hadn't been a formal ceremony, a last celebration for the youngest of the King's daughters, but Vania had always been the quiet princess and Loey wondered if the silence was her last request.

She held her memories close- they were all she had to hold on to now- as she shed a last tear for the woman who had lit up her life, whom she would never see again. And sometimes she wondered if this had all been a dream; and sometimes she wondered if that would have been better. But she knew in her heart that no one would ever see her with quite the same clarity, or burn with quite the same fire, so that though the miles stretched endless between them sometimes in the quiet of the morning Loey could almost feel her warmth.


End file.
